Healing After an Abusive Relationship
Trigger Warning: The following piece is a personal account and includes mentions of assault, self-harm and trauma. Sociologist Michael Kimmel says “feminism expects a man to be ethical, emotionally present and accountable to his values in his actions with women – as well as other men. Feminism loves men enough to expect them to act more honourably and actually believes them capable of doing so”. If you feel let down by this statement, I don’t blame you. If you feel your experiences preclude you from maintaining faith that men can be and are capable of being “ethical, emotionally present and accountable”, you are not alone. ______________ I want to tell you one particular story of mine, one I am just now gaining the courage to talk about. I was in a toxic and abusive relationship for over four years. Even though I identify as a survivor, I am also struggling to effectively apportion responsibility and blame, to put back together my self-esteem, and learn...